Honest Edition: How to become a beauty blogger in 2018

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WARNING: Sarcasm ahead, don’t proceed if you’re easily offended or a beauty blogger or Karni sena. Peace.

  1. Be Rich- If you have a good bank balance, you will be able to afford vacations to exotic locations, buy Kylie Jenner makeup online and spend it on expensive clothes that will surely help you to make other women feel a little bit miserable about their life. Additionally, if you’re really effing rich, you can party in clubs every night and post it on your Instagram handle to make those corporate nerds feel even bad about their life. Yayygiphy
  2. Take a course or Youtube lesson to learn makeup– It is very essential to learn makeup from a professional or the no cost alternative- Youtube tutorials. By doing this, you can put four layers on makeup on your face and call it ‘all natural makeup’ for your followers to believe and go gaga over your beauty.giphy1
  3. Be friends with a photographer- No need to hire a professional photographer! Just stand outside a college and grab a guy with DSLR in his hand. I’m sure he knows how to blur the backgrounds and focus only on you through his camera. In fact, no beauty blogger is complete without having a photographer friend. For you to be a successful blogger, it is essential for you to give picture credits, or ‘P.C.’ to a struggling photographer. In this way, you’ll look like a diva in every picture while the poor photographer will get some recognition (if anyone reads the P.C.s )giphy2
  4. Act like a model- Yes! Even if you are not, you have to feel like model only then you’ll be able to give the dead stare and poker face to make your followers believe that you walked right out of the runway.giphy3
  5. Post morning and night selfies- Yes you heard it right. Get up in the morning, brush your teeth, floss, put some makeup on and a natural lipgloss, then click a selfie with the caption ‘I woke up like this’. Do the same ritual at night before you remove your makeup and swear by the caption, ‘going to bed, night night’. Girls, if you want to be a beauty blogger, you have to let them into your personal space.
    giphy4
  6. Pose everywhere and anywhere- In beauty blogging, there is no bad time to click a picture. You can post with a pout in front of anything, whether it is a red splashed wall in Lucknow, in your bed, out in the corn fields or an abandoned house. Just pose, and let your friendzoned photographer do the trick.
    giphy5
  7. Get a cute pet- Now, just to enhance your cuteness factor a bit, you have to put the right amount of cute little puppies and kittens in your pictures to make the followers comment ‘Awwww’, ‘you’re so cute’ and blah blah. Use those tiny fluffs to click a few pictures with you and see the followers growing. I’m not kidding, it’s true. Here’s a picture of my dog. giphy6Like and Comment if you want my dog to keep posting such sarcastic shit.

 


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